


Snowing Heart

by UniversesAdrien



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Abusive Parents, Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Blood and Gore, Chapter 5: Trigger Warning, Cold Weather, Depression, Dialogue Heavy, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Investigations, M/M, Manipulation, Minor Character Death, Mountains, Murder, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Rating May Change, Shooting Guns, Sleep Deprivation, Slow Burn, Some Humor, Triggers, Twins, Unhealthy Relationships, mafia
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-26
Updated: 2019-07-19
Packaged: 2019-08-29 18:27:36
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 5
Words: 12,720
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16749343
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/UniversesAdrien/pseuds/UniversesAdrien
Summary: DISCLAIMER: THIS IS JUST A STORY, IF SOMETHING TRIGGERS YOU, DO NOT READ. IT IS NOT MEANT TO BE TAKEN SERIOUSLY NOR IS IT MEANT TO HURT NCT OR ANY OTHER ARTISTS.SM Entertainment gets into a giant mess, causing them to hide their artists from the media for a while.Each group gets sent to a different location, and NCT just so happens to end up in a secluded area in the mountains.What will happen when Jungwoo, 127's new member, finds out that Jaehyun is the cause of this?





	1. Nobody Said It Was Easy

-  _09:00, November 20th_ _-_

"Breaking news! South Korea's National Police Agency has just revealed that an idol from SM Entertainment is part of one of Seoul's most notorious mafia. SM Entertainment has yet to make a statement of who that idol might be."

"National Police Agency..."

"Resources revealed that an idol..."

"South Korea..."

"Lee Soo Man..."

All 21 NCT members watched the in horror as not only theirs, but their seniors were all over the media. Comments of fans were flooding their posts, begging for the outlets to be false. DMs of other actors, idols of other companies, and even relatives, asking if it was them who was in the mafia.

It was funny, just a week ago, NCT China was preparing for another comeback and NCT 127 just released their 3rd full album. Such a lovely time, but it all changed the moment Jung Yoonoh woke up that Wednesday morning.

"What do we do?" Jungwoo asked their leader, Lee Taeyong, fearfully. Taeyong furrowed his eyebrows and glanced at each member in NCT, which was a lot since it was 20 other people. He rubbed his face with both of his hands, yanking his hair slightly in frustration.

"Management will tell us what to do. Right now, let's stay close to each other and away from social media." Doyoung answered for Taeyong. He knew how stressed out Taeyong was and wanted to help him out a little. Yuta was supporting him, as well, but there was only so much the two could do for the young leader.

"Tae, you should go rest," Yuta whispered, massaging his back soothingly.

Taeyong shook his head and smiled at the younger before responding, "I'll be okay. For now, let's eat some breakfast."

"The CEO should be contacting us soon, or one of our managers." The rest of the boys stayed quiet, silently following the leader to the dining room table.

They sat there, confused and nervous, not knowing what their next step was. Jaehyun picked up his spoon, biting his lip and making it bleed slightly. It wasn't long before a knock on the door was heard, then opened by the oldest of the bunch; Taeil.

"Can I help you?" Taeil gripped the door with a tight hand, not noticing that Jaehyun was right behind him, glaring intensely. The man behind the door widened his eyes significantly at the sight of Jaehyun.

"S-Sorry, wrong one!" The man stammered nervously before running away from the dorm. Taeil sighed and shook his head before closing and locking the dark brown door.

"These guys are such weirdos. I can't wait be- jeez Jaehyun! What the hell?" Taeil jumped when he turned to see a laughing Jaehyun behind him. Jungwoo smiled sweetly at sight, almost forgetting what has spoken on the news a couple of minutes ago.

- _11:00, SM Entertainment Building-_

"We have the oath to protect these idols. We must make sure they are safe and sound," the CEO's voice echoed through the conference room. Voices of employees were nowhere to be found; they were too petrified to speak. "Not to mention we have minors within our company."

One of the managers spoke up; it was the one from Red Velvet. "What do we do then? Do we continue the schedules?" The CEO shook his head. Right when he starts to answer, the founder, Lee Soo Man himself, enters the room. Immediately, the employees stand and bow in respect to the elder.

"We send them into hiding. These are mafias we're talking about; I've spoken to the police and decided that it was safer to keep them hidden rather than to travel to their recordings and such. Those who manage and take care of the idols, make sure they have all their belongings. We'll be sending armored cars to their living spaces and take them to a secret location." No one dared to argue with him, so they nodded their heads and left to get everyone ready. The CEO had a quite a quirk to work with the founder; he wasn't particularly fond of stopping everything and losing money.

- _18:35, NCT Dormitory-_

It was time for Jaehyun to rub his face in frustration. He never thought that this would happen, that it would put his precious members in danger. He should have known to decline the offer, to not become what people were most afraid of, but see; he got excited! To lead a group of people who are the most skilled and menacing workers of all time.

"Jae, are you okay?" Jungwoo's warm voice said worryingly. Jaehyun looked up to look at him, only to meet a pair of anxious brown eyes and soft features. Jaehyun smiled slightly and nodded.

"I'll be fine." Now that was a complete lie, but Jaehyun couldn't stand seeing the boy so upset. Jungwoo sighed, sitting down next to Jaehyun. He moved his soft hand to massage Jaehyun's nape. Naturally, Jaehyun leaned into the touch and closed his eyes. He started thinking about his life, how horrible it was an unusual his mind had been. His dark brown eyes began to tear up. Naturally, he bit his lips as hard as he could to prevent any more from trailing down his face.

Jungwoo saw the single tear stream down. How couldn't he see it? How couldn't he see the love of his life cry in sorrow and regret? The one thing Jungwoo couldn't see was the pain and evil Jaehyun held in his heart.

- _21:36, Taeyong's room-_

"I just got word from the manager; he's going to send all 21 of us to a place in the mountains. I don't know where exactly, I don't even think he knows." Taeyong sighed deeply before resting his head on Yuta's lap. Yuta smiled warmly and ran his hand through Taeyong's dyed locks. His hair was getting softer as Yuta's nagging convinced Taeyong to stop dying his hair and let it breathe. The two sat there quietly, in their little world, until Johnny bursting through the door.

"Jisung is missing!" He yelled at them. His eyes were blown with fear and anxiety, not daring to turn to see Chenle's worried expression. Taeyong immediately got up from his seat and ran out the door with Johnny. Yuta sat there in shock while Chenle's chest started going up and down.

"Chenle, honey, don't worry. They'll find him; everything will be okay." Yuta ran over to the panicked boy and sat him down gently. He gave instructions to Jeno and Jaemin, telling them to get Taeil and Kun. Chenle started to breathe rapidly, vision blurring, and heart racing as fast as a cheetah. Before anyone could do a thing, Chenle fainted in the arms of the Japanese singer.

- _03:00, November 21st-_

Jaehyun was still stressing over the news, hating how careless he was being. He grabbed his blue pillow and silently screamed into it. He was furious at himself, so much he would choke the hell out of the next person she saw. Sadly, the next person was no other than his long-term friend, Johnny. Johnny was just an inch taller than he was, but that didn't matter to Jaehyun.

Jaehyun looked up from his pillow, eyes red with anger and is popping out of his head. Johnny yawned and waved the younger goodnight. The next thing he knew, Jaehyun was pinning him to the bed. He grasped Johnny's neck and held on tightly, Jaehyun gritted his teeth in frustration. Johnny kicked and kicked until his breathing started to become shallow, tears trickling down his freshly washed face.

"J-Jaehyun- s-stop it! I-I can't b-breathe!" Johnny tried to pull his milky white hands away, but Jaehyun didn't give in. Instead, he held on tighter. "I-I don't want t-to die..." With those five words, Jaehyun quickly withdrew his hold and jumped off of the older's neck. Johnny heavily spits trailing down his chin and tears covering his face.

"Johnny, oh my god, Johnny! What did I do?!" Jaehyun started to panic and cry along with Johnny. He ran over to him and tackled him back onto the bed. "I'll get you water, j-just don't go anywhere!"

At this point, Johnny was confused more than ever. Was this the Jaehyun he's been friends with for years? Was this the Jaehyun that almost choked him to death? He grabbed onto the bed frame and stumbled into the bathroom, where he would see angry marks on his neck, staring intensely at him.

"Hyung, I'm sorry to bother you, but have you seen Jaehyun? He hasn't-" Jungwoo's eyes widened in fear as he saw the handprints on Johnny's neck. "Johnny, what happened?! Who did this to you?!" Jungwoo ran over and examined his neck, waiting for an answer.

Although, before Johnny could respond, Jaehyun walked in with a tall glass of cold water. Jaehyun saw Jungwoo and almost dropped it onto the hardwood floor. Johnny noticed and quickly waved the younger away. "I-I got into a fight with a friend, i-it's nothing now, though."

"That's complete bullshit! It's not something to ignore! These marks look like they're recent! I'm going to go get Taeyong-hyung!" Jungwoo got up and turned around, but Jaehyun was blocking the way out. It terrified Johnny to the core of his very existence.

"It's true, Woo. The fight was pretty intense. I tried to stop it, but it only got worse. No need to tell Taeyong, too, he already knows." Jaehyun looked straight into Jungwoo's eyes and smiled darkly. Of course, Jungwoo didn't see that; he only saw a caring human being bringing water to a friend. He sighed and gave Johnny's arm a small squeeze before leaving.

"I believe you, for now... but if this happens again, I'm going to our manager!" Jaehyun nodded and looked at Johnny. The latter jumped back and put his arms up in defense.

"Don't worry; I won't hurt you. I-I'm sorry for what happened, by the way, I don't know what got into me. I-If it happens again; I want you to lock me in a room." He looked straight at the taller's eyes, which were drowning in genuine distress, and gave a tight smile. Johnny quickly agreed and pushed past him to get his pillow and blanket.

"I'm gonna go sleep with Taeil, w-we we're going to watch a movie." Jaehyun squinted in suspicion, but Johnny didn't notice as he was running out of the room like Sonic the Hedgehog. Jaehyun rubbed his face once again, not giving a single damn about his skin, but giving a damn about the poor marks on his friend's neck.

That day, NCT experienced one of the worst days in their careers. Worse than the day that Doyoung, Jeno, and Renjun were in a car accident that ended up with the vehicle drowning in the river.


	2. Is Everything Okay?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just let me hold you.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! Hope you enjoy this chapter! A new story is always exciting!
> 
> Have a nice day!

_-21:00, October 13th, Flashback-_

"In more recent news, we have just received a report by the National Police Agency that a white BMW has crashed into the railing of Banpo Bridge. The vehicle has said to contain two managers of the boy group NCT as well as three members named Kim Dongyoung, Lee Jeno, and Huang Renjun. The five victims have since transferred to a nearby hospital, where doctors say they are lucky to be alive." The news reporter said in a monotone voice.

The NCT members packed the waiting room of Seongmo Hospital as well as the available family of the victims accompanying them. Kim Gongmyung paced back and forth in the area, waiting for any updates on his younger brother. Just as he was going to ask, Taeyong came back with a relieved expression.

"They said the surgery went well with Doyoung, Jeno, and Renjun. Although, one of the managers didn't make it." Suddenly cries were heard by the family; a doctor stood in front of them explaining the situation.

The tone of the room was gloomy, even the most cheerful members were full of tears and worry lines. Ten sniffed, wiping his eyes and taking a deep breath. Jaemin curled into a ball, and Chenle tried his best to hug the living hell out of Lucas. The three were hanging on, but only by a thread as their loved ones were fighting for their lives.

"I'll call the company, let them know what happened." Taeyong was visibly shaking, but his face was sharp and voice stern. Yuta quickly got up to sit the leader down. It wasn't always comfortable caring for everyone, despite having constant help from Kun. Kun was barely on his way to the hospital with Sicheng and Xiaojun, so he had to handle the situation on his own.

- _06:39, November 21st, End of Flashback-_

"They found Jisung, he got lost and spent the night in a convenience store." Johnny's dark circles were as visible as the sun in the sky. The older man called every person he knew about his whereabouts, ultimately getting his answer from Jisung. Jisung had used an old lady's phone to call Taeyong and Mark since his died.

Chenle woke up a couple of hours later. He quickly sat up from his bed and ran to the kitchen. There sat Jisung getting scolded for staying out late and not calling one of the managers or members to pick him up.

"Jisung, thank goodness! I thought you got hurt or something!" Chenle tackled him down and cried in his shoulder. His mind started to swarm with relief and happiness when hearing Jisung laugh and whisper that he was fine many times in his ear.

_-13:56, November 23rd, SM Building-_

Jaehyun sat quietly in the middle of the practice room. He started rummaging through his memories of the other day, thinking where it went wrong so quickly. Johnny has avoided him at all costs, causing Taeil to ask more and more questions by the minute. The oldest member was worried about the two and even talked to Taeyong about it, but the leader simply waved him off. He told Taeil to let them resolve it on their own, and if they didn't within the month, he would talk to them for him.

Taeil sighed deeply, grasping the handle to the door Jaehyun was currently residing. Although, he didn't open the door, instead, he turned away and walked to the room next to it. That's where Johnny laid staring at the marks made by his best friend. Before he could open the door, Jungwoo ran to him and stopped to catch his breath. Jaehyun stood by the door, waiting for someone to open it.

"Hyung! Have you seen Jaehyun? I need help with a puzzle, and he promised he would help me." Taeil pointed at the door he was just at, and Jungwoo jogged to it.

Meanwhile, Jaehyun was getting angry again. He stared at the mirror, examining his features that turned so cold and dark in a matter of seconds. His eyes were red at the rims, lips chapped and bleeding from biting them so much, knuckles red from punching the bag that stood in the middle of the first-floor gym. He walked towards the mirror and touched the glass gently. How could he be so careless? His biggest secret in the whole world and it was exposed because of some mishap in their office. He put his entire company in danger, hell; he put the love of his life in danger.

"Jaehyun." Before Jungwoo could finish his sentence, he was shoved aside by the boy with dimples. Jaehyun rushed to the bathroom next to Johnny's practice room and pulled out an untraceable phone. He scrolled down the contact list, picking the one named "X" before dialing the number.

"Sir, we still need your approval to move with the execution." The voice rang through his ears, reaching nowhere but his brain.

"Do it, cut up his body and attach each limp to a board, that bastard just cost us everything. Make sure you publicize this because otherwise, the citizens won't know what happens when you fuck with the Jolt group." Jaehyun snarled at the man.

"Yes, my lord." The call ended, just like Jaehyun's respect for humankind.

- _On the other side of the building-_

"Doyoung, you're still recovering. Why don't you sit down and I'll get you something from the cafeteria?" Ten's soft voice rang through Doyoung's ears as he struggled to walk with his two crutches.

Doyoung sighed but eventually agreed to rest while the other left to get food. He thought about that horrible week in the hospital. For one week, Renjun was in a medically-induced coma, causing his stay to extend for another week. He couldn't even talk to Jeno since a nurse had put him in a separate room with the manager. It left Doyoung to spend every moment looking out the window and watch boring dramas on TV.

"Are you thinking about the boys?" Ten asked, setting down a steaming cup of coffee and a neatly wrapped sandwich. Doyoung nodded quietly before preparing the coffee with what he liked, which wasn't much since the boy loved it bitter.

"I wonder how they're doing. I mean, Jeno has a broken arm and Renjun has to be in a wheelchair for two months because of his legs." Ten wondered the same thing. He hadn't seen the two since they got back from the hospital, and it didn't matter at this point. They would all soon combine in a mansion in the mountains.

- _22:00, NCT Dormitory-_

News of the police's findings was still spreading, but the netizens' threats and anger died down by a massive amount. Jaehyun sat silently in front of the television and chewed his mint flavored gum in peace. The harmony he had changed when Jungwoo joined him with a small bowl of carrots.

"Hey," Jungwoo spoke after a couple of minutes of them staring at the television. Jaehyun turned to him, eyes having no emotion and frown deeper than his feelings. "You've been kind of off lately. How are you doing? Johnny hasn't talked to you in days, and you guys are best friends, plus you shoved me earlier." Although it was an interrogation of some sort, his voice never wavered nor did it change from his normal gentle tone.

Jaehyun stopped chewing his gum before answering, "I'm not doing so well if I'm honest. The chance of one of us connected to a notorious mafia terrifies me, and I guess I acted badly. I was so angry at myself, and I took it out on Johnny. It wasn't smart, and I would do anything to get him to even look at me for a second." Jaehyun looked up at the ceiling, not wanting to show Jungwoo his tears and regret. After Jungwoo heard his statement,  he almost immediately wrapped his arms around Jaehyun.

"I just want him by my side again, b-but I don't think that's going to happen." Jaehyun sobbed harder as he tightened his hold on Jungwoo. The younger naturally stroked his head and murmured soothing words into his ears.

While the two laid in each other's arms, Johnny hid behind the kitchen counter and heard every word Jaehyun said. He sat there in shock, not remembering why he came to the kitchen in the first place.

"Johnny, come back to bed. I miss you," Taeil muttered. He slid over to Johnny and wrapped his arms around Johnny's neck, massaging his nape. "Baby, what's wrong? You look like you just saw a ghost."

"I-It's nothing, let's go. We can have hot chocolate another time." Taeil smiled sweetly and lead him back to their shared bed, both slipping under the covers. It took Johnny a moment to realize that Taeil was wearing nothing but an oversized shirt and some briefs. He smiled slightly and fell asleep quickly with Taeil curled against him.

Alas, the dorm filled with faint snores and light sniffles. For a second, NCT thought the rumor wasn't going to affect them at all. Little did they know, one of the members would be the very cause of everyone sent into isolated areas of the world.

Were they going to be okay? Taeyong wondered and wondered until his brain started to fry by how hard he was thinking.

- _02:54, November 30th, NCT Dormitory-_

"Is everyone packed? We're leaving!" Taeyong shouted, walking through the halls that housed 20 other people. He saw Mark helping the Dream kids, Donghyuck trying to wake up Jisung again, and Renjun wheeling to the elevator. Lucas stood behind him and carried the other's bags, which caused Taeyong to smile fondly at them. Yuta yawned and buried himself into a hoodie he stole from Taeyong.

In the other rooms, Jaemin carried both his and Jeno's bags. The rest started to pile into cars, putting luggage into trunks and snacks on their laps. It was going to be a long trip, no one minded.

- _04:10, December 1st-_

After a long car and plane ride, NCT finally arrived at their destination. Everyone felt the uneasiness in the air as not going to work and practice for so long was unusual. Jaehyun's glare was intense, scaring Jungwoo and Doyoung, who sat next to him on the flight. Although, it quickly deteriorated when Johnny walked up to him, wrapped in his heavy winter coat.

"Johnny, I-" Jaehyun started, but Johnny waved him off and smiled sweetly at him. "Please, I'm so sorry, I never meant to hurt you, I don't know what came over me, I know you'll probably never forgive me, hear me out." A small tear fell from Jaehyun's eye. Everyone rushed inside as the cold air swept through.

"It's okay, Jae. I heard you talking to Jungwoo the other night. Stop worrying, okay? The only thing I'd wish is for you to tell me when something is bothering you, we're best friends." Johnny's voice was soft and comforting to the younger, which made everything much more manageable. Jaehyun smiled and sniffed, walking with the rest of the members to go inside their new home.

- _06:32-_

Despite being jet-lagged, the members of NCT moved in smoothly. Taeyong spoke to the management and discovered that they wouldn't interact with the outside world for months. He didn't know what to do or say, so he kept it as a secret with the six oldest members; Taeil, Johnny, Yuta, Kun, Doyoung, and himself. He also told Mark as he put the boy in charge of the Dream members, not forgetting that he graduated all that time ago. 

Although, he did neglect the fact that they added three members who were younger than Mark, two being the same age as Mark and another being younger than Jaemin but older than Chenle. It was an enormous responsibility, but he knew him, and Renjun could handle it. It was odd, if he was honest, Hendery and Xiaojun seemed to be older but was younger, and Yangyang acted very maturely for his age. 

"How about breakfast?" Yuta said, holding onto the leader's arm sleepily. Taeyong smiled and nodded, heading to the kitchen to get out ingredients to cook for 21 people. Kun and Johnny joined him, joking around and setting the table. They were all hopelessly tired, but it was okay.

That's what they wanted to think, that the situation at hand was going to be okay.


	3. Heat and Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How could you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> WARNING!: Graphic scenes and language ahead! Please be cautious!
> 
> Hope you enjoy the chapter!

_-09:00, December 2nd-_

"Sir! Turn on the TV! It's about one of our employees!" It was a hectic morning at the SM building, with police and workers running around, there was barely any space to breathe.

"Earlier this morning, police discovered the cut up body of a former SM Entertainment employee. Authorities say that he had gone missing the day after he quit. They also say that he was the one that gave police information about an idol being from the notorious mafia, the Jolt Group." It was at this time that all employees gathered around televisions, computer screens, phones, anything to watch the news.

"The following is not for the ill-minded or poor hearted. Please watch with caution." On the screen showed the man pinned and scattered on a large wooden board. A message written on a laminated piece of paper was attached to the man's face. People watched in shock, and one even fainted at the treacherous sight.

"The message reads: let this be a warning to all citizens of South Korea. This man told lies! All liars must be punished and pay the full price for messing with the Jolt Group. We will show no mercy to anyone."

The note went on to show the symbol of the group that gave everyone nightmares. Multiple people whispered amongst themselves and feared for their lives, making plans to go to the hardware shop later. It became a plan to put more locks on their doors.

- _12:47, Same Day-_

"Come on, tell me. If you had the chance to go on a date with either Mark or Jeno, who out of both of them would you choose?" While the rest of the older members slept, the original Dream members sat in a circle in the middle of the large living room. Donghyuck thought about the question before looking at Jaemin. The boys in question had tainted cheeks and nervous expressions, which made both Jaemin and Donghyuck laugh.

"I choose Mark, as much as I care for Jeno, he's more suited for you than for me." It was Jaemin's turn to blush, all three became a flustered mess, but all Donghyuck could do was smile and bite his lips. Chenle and Jisung rolled their eyes and thought about leaving the idiots in love.

"Renjun, how are you feeling?" Chenle asked, speaking in his native tongue. Jisung spent so much time with Chenle and Yangyang that he picked up a couple of words and phrases.

"It's not the worst; I have everyone helping me. It still does suck though, there's all this snow, and I can't play in it." Renjun frowned. With the help of Jaemin, Jeno stood up and walked over to give Renjun a big hug with his one movable arm.

"If it makes you feel better, snow sucks ass." Renjun smiled and laughed, causing everyone to burst into a fit of giggles. Mark glanced at Donghyuck and thought about what he felt about him. He shook his head and looked ahead, wanting to focus on the injured kids instead.

Mark looked back at the group, thinking about their times before Mark graduated from Dream. Oh, how he missed the boys fighting then giggling in excitement a second after. Although, what Mark missed the most was the soft smile of Donghyuck. Donghyuck is still in 127, but lately, he was always with Dream, so Mark barely got to see him.

"Just tell him, dude." A sudden whisper came, shocking Mark and making him fall off the couch. It was Lucas. Mark held his hand to his chest and checked his heartbeat; it was racing a million miles an hour at this point.

"Lucas, at least warn me before you do that! You almost gave me a heart attack!" Mark gasped and stumbled back onto the couch. Lucas laughed loudly and hid his face in his hands, turning beet red.

"Where's the fun in that?" Lucas snickered, trying to calm down his giggles before turning to Renjun and giving him a peck on the cheek. It was Renjun's turn to turn tomato red, shocking everyone.

- _21:00-_

Jaehyun opened the door to the front porch and sat down quietly with his hot chocolate. He blew softly on the beverage and cleared his throat before pulling out another untraceable phone. Jaehyun looked around to see if anyone was coming out and dialed X, the person he called earlier for the execution of that worker.

"My lord, the killing went well. The media has been responding non-stop, and we've gotten calls from multiple sectors saying they want to work with us. When will you be coming back to the headquarters? They're all waiting." The monotone voice spoke sternly, waiting for a reply.

"I'm afraid I'm stuck here. You'll have to come to me. And thank you for making sure I had service over here, otherwise I would have been screwed over." Jaehyun took a sip of his hot chocolate and shivered slightly at the warm substance.

"No need to thank me, I'll send someone right over. Is there anyone else we need to take care of because otherwise, we should continue with the original plan?" He asked, slightly enthusiastic and wonderous.

"I can't think of anyone at the moment. When you send someone over, notify me, and transfer all the personal information of the employees at SM Entertainment, including the idols. I thought I was on vacation, but I have my duties." Jaehyun said, causing the person on the other line to laugh. The conversation continued as they discussed the details of the current plan and the original one, making little changes according to the citizens' responses. 

"Well, sir, being the leader of the Jolt group is no easy task, but your father would be proud by your accomplishments. You made the world terrified of us and the stupid police running around the place like dogs." Jaehyun smiled evilly and thanked the other for the compliments. 

What the dimpled boy didn't know, was that Jungwoo would be standing behind the door with a blanket, listening to every single word. He saw the older outside sipping something out of a mug and decided to join him. Jungwoo hoped that he could make his move, but that changed when he heard Jaehyun speak.

Fear and confusion covered his face, his breathing quickened, and the hold on the blanket became unbelievably tight. Jungwoo tried not to listen for any longer, but he failed horribly and stood there. He even stood there when Jaehyun came in through the door.

"Jungwoo? I thought you were asleep," Jaehyun started to panic, questions popping up in his head. He saw the expression Jungwoo wore and immediately found his answers. "How long have you been standing here?" He stepped closer to Jungwoo, causing the other to drop the blanket and run away from him. Jaehyun started to chase him, not wanting for Jungwoo to spill any critical information.

Jungwoo sprinted across the halls and eventually reached the stairs. He tried his best to reach the top but failed when Jaehyun got ahold of him. He slapped his arms away, trying to get as far away as he could from Jaehyun. Although, the other would not let go as he tightened his grip on his frail body.

"Don't hurt me! Please, I swear I didn't hear anything!" Jungwoo spoke through his sobs. Even though Jaehyun has been in the business for a long time, it still broke him to see people scared of him.

"Jungwoo, I-I don't want you to be scared of me. Please, listen to what I have to say." Jungwoo shook his head and tried to pry his fingers away from his waist. Jaehyun watched as the boy struggled to escape. He turned his love around and pinned him to the clothed stairs. He held Jungwoo's wrists over his head, resulting Jungwoo to cry for help.

"You caused all this-" Before Jungwoo could finish his sentence, Jaehyun crashed his lips with his, making Jungwoo let out a strangled noise. A single tear trailed down from his face as he felt warm lips move against his. Jaehyun's hold on the younger weakened but Jungwoo didn't move, letting his mouth take over. He felt a mix of emotions, ranging from betrayal to intense love for the being on top of him. Jaehyun pulled away as he heard a loud cough coming from the bottom of the staircase.

"Not that I mind you two kissing, but can you do it in private, please? We have minors running around," Taeyong deadpanned. Yuta rolled his eyes and dragged the leader to their shared room. "I'm begging you! I do not want any weird stains on the stairs!" Jungwoo turned red, finally escaping.

"Jungwoo, please listen to me!" Although, Jungwoo couldn't look at him for another second. He ran to his room and slammed the door shut, locking it in the process. Jaehyun cursed under his breath and slammed his phone to the ground. He kicked the remains away and slumped against the railing.

This moment was the downfall of Jung Yoonoh; the employee exposing them, the marks on Johnny's neck, the lies and betrayal to Jungwoo, and for what cost? What's the point if you don't have anyone to rule? Jaehyun laughed bitterly and stumbled to Jungwoo's door, he knocked and knocked, but no answer came.

He slid down the door and sat there, letting tears slip down his face. Jungwoo heard the knocks but was too scared to open the door. He got close to the doorknob, wanting to forget everything and jump into the warm arms of Jaehyun. Instead, he matched Jaehyun's actions and slid down the door. The two sat there, in tears and broken beyond repair.

- _04:23, December 3rd-_

"Taeil, why are we up at this ungodly hour?" Johnny asked. A few minutes before, Taeil had woken him up and dragged him out of bed. Johnny was currently half asleep and had his arms around Taeil, clinging onto him like a Koala bear.

"I want to look at the sunset and cook breakfast for everyone!" Taeil hummed excitedly. They walked down the hall, not seeing Jaehyun's sleeping figure along the way. "What the hell? What is he doing here asleep? I thought he was sharing a room with Jungwoo."

"He should be, that is unless they fought some sort." Johnny shrugged and kept walking before Taeil stopped him. "No way, I am not carrying him! Taeil, no, don't look at me like that!" Taeil gave puppy eyes to him, which caused Johnny to groan and pick up Jaehyun, setting him on the extra bed in his and Taeil's room.

Johnny looked at Jaehyun before switching his gaze to Jungwoo's door. He bit his lip and tried to open the door, successfully going in and seeing a wide-awake Jungwoo, sitting by the window. The young boy had tears flowing down his face, sniffing softly and feeling his cold lips.

Johnny decided not to say anything and left him alone. As he walked down the stairs, he noticed Taeyong chatting quietly with Taeil. The leader seemed to be in distress, his arm being stroked comfortingly by his lover.

"We haven't even been here that long, and things have already gone to shit," Taeyong let out a shaky sigh, sipping his coffee and leaning into Yuta's warm touch. "They kissed and seemed pretty okay to me. Although, it was an odd place to be making out. What could have happened?"

They soon collectively fell silent when Jaehyun walked in, hair disheveled and eyes red at the brim. He slid over to the sink and filled a cup with cold water, causing everyone to stare at him with confused expressions.

"Do I look that bad in the morning? No wonder they put makeup on me, I must look like a fucking demon if I have Taeyong giving me THAT look." Taeyong flushed and turned away, embarrassed while Yuta giggled and responded for him.

"Jaehyun you look like a Greek god regardless the time of day. We're just worried because you fell asleep on the floor in front of your room with Woo. Did something happen or were you just too lazy to walk in?" They didn't know how much of a mess Jungwoo looked, so Johnny kept quiet and stared at Jaehyun.

"I-I was just too lazy to go to bed. It's a long week, you know?" Jaehyun stuttered as he drank his water and washed it not long after. Johnny squinted at him and wondered why he lied directly at their faces. He now had enough of his antics.

"Must have been a long enough week for you to fucking strangle me and make Jungwoo cry. Seriously, what the hell is going on?! Are you the idol that everyone's been talking about, huh?" Johnny was red with anger, and it terrified everyone, including Jaehyun. He was right, though, he was the idol, but he wasn't about to expose himself.

"Wait, he was the one that did that to you? And what do you mean Jungwoo cried?" Questions swarmed Taeyong's head, and he needed answers, but right now, he needed to calm everyone down. "You know what, we'll talk about this later, but now you need to calm down, Johnny. It isn't fair that you're accusing him of such a horrible thing! We're family, and we protect each other! Regardless of he is part of Jolt." Taeyong whispered the last sentence.

"Listen, what's going on between Jungwoo and I is none of your business. I understand you're worried but to accuse me is such a new low." Johnny huffed and shook his head. He leaned back against the counter, finishing his coffee. Taeil walked over and wrapped his arms around his love before kissing his angry face.

Jaehyun sighed and walked back up the stairs, gently pushing Jungwoo's door open. "Can we talk, please?" Jungwoo turned his head from the window and stared at him. He nodded before pulling his knees to his chest.

Jungwoo stayed silent for a second before whispering to Jaehyun, who was now sitting in front of him. "Why?" It was one word, but it hit Jaehyun like a brick, and it hit him hard. Jaehyun bit his lip and reached out his hand to hold Jungwoo's own.

"First, I want you to know what I would never do anything that would hurt you or any of the members. Second," Jaehyun swallowed thickly, "I need you to know that I love you and I'm sorry that I kissed you so suddenly yesterday. I should have asked you first, and I know now that you would have said no in a single second." Jungwoo stared out the window and frowned. He turned back to Jaehyun and waited for the other to continue.

"What you heard last night was completely real. I was born into the Jolt group; my father was the leader before he was killed and raised me to take his place. I didn't have much of choice in the matter. Growing up, people taught me how to shoot a gun, how to make a murder look like a suicide or accident, and how to differentiate drugs. I'm not just a member, Jungwoo, I'm the fucking leader." Jungwoo sat there in shock; he was completely speechless. "I'm a monster, Jungwoo. I've done so many things to this country, ended so many lives. I even put you in all in danger." Jaehyun looked up from the floor, only to see Jungwoo's chest rising rapidly. The other snatched his hand away and quickly got up.

Jungwoo looked around the room and pulled on his hair. His breathing was getting quicker and was on the edge of having an attack. Jaehyun noticed and helped the boy sit down. He looked through the drawers of their room and found Jungwoo's medication along with two other bottles of medicine.

"Jungwoo, what are these?" Jaehyun held up the two bottles of unknown drugs. He gave the third bottle to Jungwoo as that was his medication for anxiety. Jungwoo felt a wave of dizziness and nausea. He decided to drink more water before answering Jaehyun's question.

"Jae, it says what it's for on the bottle. They're antidepressants and pain medication." Jungwoo held his head between his hands and sighed deeply. He reached out and grabbed the medication out of Jaehyun's hand. Jaehyun bit his lip and sat next to Jungwoo, watching him take one pill from the bottle that stored his anxiety medication.

"You take medication for depression, anxiety, and your back. I thought the pain went away." Jungwoo shook his head and placed the three bottles back in the nightstand, hidden from the rest of the boys.

"We're getting off topic, Jaehyun," Jungwoo said, shaking and waiting for the medication to settle in. "You're the one who caused us all to go into hiding? Because of you, we're going to be away from everyone and everything! We came here to live our lives, not hide and fear for them!" Jungwoo started to raise his voice at the end of his sentence. Jaehyun kept his mouth shut and didn't look at the other.

"I didn't mean for that man to go to the police, let alone for us to go into fucking hiding! It doesn't even matter now, he's been taken care of, and they won't have any more evidence." Jaehyun exclaimed. He still didn't look at Jungwoo.

"How did you take care of him, Yoonoh?" Jungwoo reached out and held Jaehyun's arm, pleading for an answer. "How are you take care of him?! Look at me, damn it!" Finally, Jaehyun turned to him and had the same expression he had when he choked Johnny. Fear and concern filled Jungwoo's eyes, causing Jaehyun to soften a little.

"I had him killed, okay? If I didn't do anything, he would have spilled more information. This situation we're in isn't a game, Woo. Your life was in more danger when he was alive, and now that he's gone, you all can rest for once. I did what I had to do because if I didn't, other mafias and gangs would have come for you. He died with the information about my identity. Do you realize that if he told the police my name, other mafias and gangs would have gotten a hold of it and kill the rest of you?" Jaehyun stroked the younger's cheek with gentle hands, eyes flickering from his eyes to his pink lips.

Jungwoo's lips formed a thin line, his mind thinking of how to respond. Instead, he stared straight into Jaehyun's eyes and leaned into his scalding touch. They leaned in, bodies close and breaths blending. The two souls were so close to each other, just one bit and their whole worlds would have changed drastically.

"We can't do this, Jaehyun," Jungwoo whispered, foreheads touching lightly. Jaehyun's hand slipped from his face and found its way around Jungwoo's waist. He pulled the younger close, almost seating him on his lap, but did not make a move to kiss Jungwoo.

"We can, Jungwoo, but it's my confession and past that's making you rethink the way you feel towards me." Jaehyun's grip didn't budge one bit when Jungwoo tried to wiggle away, he didn't want this moment to fade away, and he didn't wish for Jungwoo to leave him. Jungwoo huffed and slapped Jaehyun across his face. It was only 04:45 and both of them shattered to their cores.

"Fuck you! Fuck you for making me fall for you! Fuck you for everything, Jung Yoonoh!" Jungwoo screamed as he gripped Jaehyun's shirt tightly, shaking him back and forth in anger. Tears stung his eyes, and eventually, Jungwoo fell forward, sobbing into his chest. 

Jaehyun still didn't budge. Instead, he stroked Jungwoo's hair and allowed him to thrash him around. He knew the members would react horribly and expected a hit once they found out who he indeed was, what he didn't prepare for, was Jungwoo's reaction. Jaehyun had fallen fast and hard for him and in no way did it help that the boy found out while listening to his conversation.

In a matter of minutes, Jungwoo had fallen asleep in the arms of Jaehyun. It caused him to reposition themselves so they would wake up in a comfortable position. Jaehyun smiled and thanked the heavens that Jungwoo was a deep sleeper.

- _09:30-_

Despite sleeping for five hours, the couple felt refreshed and calm. Jaehyun looked out the window, looking at the cloudy sky and snow-covered trees. He rubbed Jungwoo's arm and winced at the sudden pain on his right cheek.

"I'm sorry for slapping you." It was a whisper but held so much regret and love. Jungwoo was laying on Jaehyun's chest, and they were holding each other under the soft pile of warm blankets.

"I'm sorry for being the notorious leader of a mafia." Jungwoo burst into a fit of giggles and playfully slapped Jaehyun's chest. He looked up to see him smiling brightly with his dimpled face. Slowly, but evidently, they leaned in once more. This time, no slaps or whispered interrupted them. 

"Hey, Taeyong is asking if you guys want to make cookies," Doyoung asked as he chewed on a baby carrot. He looked like a bunny at that moment. None of the boys bothered to answer since the kiss they were longing for had finally occurred. Doyoung smiled and shrugged his shoulders before closing the door quietly. "I guess they don't."

- _14:25-_

"I had a dream where Chenle was rocking out to people arguing. I thought it was real until I realized it was four in the morning. I never wake up at four and Chenle is always dead when he touches a bed." Chenle opened his mouth to protest but rapidly shut it when Sicheng entered the room.

"Let's go play in the snow. There's not a blizzard outside, and it's not that cold. Plus, the snow is soft enough to make snowballs and snowmen." Sicheng smiled. Chenle and Jisung got up and cheered happily. They ran up to their room to get ready, not noticing three injured souls frowning.

"While they go freeze their asses off, how about we decorate some cookies?" Yuta said, clapping his hands together and smiling brightly. Doyoung, Renjun, and Jeno's faces lit up when they heard cookies and decorating.

Yuta had always held Sicheng close to his heart, but at that moment, all he wanted to do was throw a pan at his head. He scowled at him before helping Renjun to the table. Taeyong snickered and patted Sicheng's shoulder, telling him to watch the youngest members of the group closely.

"Can I get a heart cookie? I want to decorate it for Jaemin!" Jeno exclaimed excitedly

"C-Can I get an angel for Lucas?" Taeyong and Yuta cooed at Renjun, handing him a sugar cookie shaped like an angel. Doyoung reached over and got a tree-shaped cookie, smiling at the people seated around him. All six of them started to decorate cookies, and it was a joyful moment amongst them.

Renjun got the butterknife and spread a light coat of white frosting onto the angel-shaped cookie. He smiled at the neatness of his work but slowly frowned. His mind started to trail off to the night he woke up in the hospital.

- _Flashback-_

When Renjun woke up, he couldn't recall a single memory he made in Korea. His deep brown eyes were filled in confusion as the doctor started to ask him questions in a foreign language. His heartbeat began to pace as he searched for someone he could understand. Finally, he looked a black-haired boy who resembled a supermodel.

"Renjun! You're awake!" Renjun wanted to speak so badly, but the tubes coming out of his body were preventing him. He struggled to move his legs and run over to hide behind the supermodel. He was so focused on the other that he didn't hear the conversation going on in front of him.

"It's temporary amnesia. Renjun recovers in no time, like Jeno and Doyoung." He was talking to a red-haired boy, also someone who looked like he was a model, but more like an anime character. He looked stressed out and had tear streaks going down his face. "I know you all are going through a hard time, so I suggest you guys take it easy. It'll be good for not only the injured ones but those around you."

At that moment, the young boy had never felt so alone and lost. He was surrounded by all these people who looked worried and sleep deprived, but he felt isolated. Eventually, Renjun gave up on trying to get their attention and stared blankly at the ceiling.

- _End Flashback-_

"Renjun, are you done with your angel? We're going to put the cookies in the fridge and wait for the others so we can decorate with them." Doyoung patted his back gently before taking the cookie out of his hand and placing it on the tray Taeyong was holding. Suddenly, a tear escaped the young boy's eye.

Renjun felt a wave of fear and seclusion when he saw a figure walk through the kitchen door and into the dining room. It was no other than Jung Jaehyun, the boy everyone adored and thought was the sweetest person in the world.

"It's the afternoon already? How long did I stay in bed?" Jaehyun laughed as he sat down next to Doyoung, who smirked at him. Renjun stared at them and dropped his head. Neither of them noticed when he wheeled away to the elevator that sat behind the massive staircase.

Renjun always had a bad feeling about the dimpled man so every time he saw or even felt him come in, he left the room. Little did Renjun know that the darkness he thought he felt was more accurate than he would ever imagine.

No one needed to know that, though. At least not at that moment.

"Jaehyun, was Johnny right about the marks?" Taeyong spoke up. Yuta looked at him, shocked by the sudden question. Doyoung was confused, and Jeno felt like it was time for him to leave the room and the conversation.

"No, of course not, Tae. He was just tired, and I don't blame him. We're both just not getting along recently." Jaehyun's wicked smile came back, lies and dishonesty shining through. The sweet moment he shared with Jungwoo was the only genuine thing he did that day, but no one needed to know that.

"Well, you guys better start getting along, or I'll kick both of your asses. We're going to be here a while, and I can't have my two giants getting into arguments and fighting." Taeyong grumbled, pouting inconsiderably. Yuta looked at Taeyong lovingly and pecked his pouting lips. The serious second was gone in a flash, causing giggles and smiles shared.

No one wanted to talk any further about what happened that morning. Nor did the members want to talk about the reason they were in hiding as the very thought of one of the members causing the scandal scared them to death.

Running away from the problem at hand is never good, but that's what they did. NCT decided to run that day because soon, everyone would have to come and face reality. They would quickly have to face the terrifying moment where they had to choose between their family or their lives.


	4. Don't Leave Me

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I think I lost something, but I don't know what...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Welcome to another chapter! I planned for this chapter to be quite long, like around 5k, but ended up at 2k due to some technical issues. It's fixed now but hopefully, I'll have a longer chapter next time!
> 
> Also, I will be ending my first fic called "Why" soon, I enjoyed writing it and love how I got 3k+ hits on it, but it's time to have it come to an end. I will also be ending my second fic, Time, but that's not for another couple of months as there are 6 chapters worth I need to write.
> 
> Please look forward to another NCT fic coming in the future! It will be called Lock My Sanity and will be Taeyong x Taeil, please leave suggestions for other ships!
> 
> Thank you and enjoy chapter 4 of Snowing Heart!

_-21:32, December_ _5th_ _-_

"Johnny, please talk to me! Hey, wait, please! Don't close the door!" Jaehyun shouted, running towards Johnny. The other just kept walking until he stopped and turned to him, eyes filled with anger and sadness.

"What could you possibly want, huh? Are you here to apologize or do I have to put my defenses up?" Johnny glared at Jaehyun and waited for a response, but all Jaehyun do, was stutter and sniff. He merely shook his head and turned into his room, where Taeil sat patiently in their bed. Johnny smiled and closed the door on Jaehyun's face.

Jaehyun huffed and banged on the door until an annoyed Johnny opened it, hair a mess and clothes wrinkled up, looking like he was laying down.

"I wanted to apologize because you're my best friend and I care about you, you asshat! You have stood by me after all these years, and it feels like my irrational anger ruined it all. I'm terrified and lost, Johnny. Please, don't shut me out now, plus, I thought that you already forgave me!" Jaehyun yelled at him.

Jaehyun stared and stared, trying his best to destroy Johnny's tough facade. His sentences didn't make any sense, but he didn't care, all he cared was that his members trusted him wholly and loved him as much as he loved them.

"It's going to take some time, Jaehyun. I could forget it all and trust you as I did before, but I can't. Every time I look at you, I get memories of you gripping my neck, and suddenly I can't seem to breathe or live. I thought I already forgave you, but I was completely wrong when I heard your bleeding lies. For now, stay away from Jungwoo and us, I don't want him to end up with the means of you." Those words hurt Jaehyun, even though he knew that he deserved it. He wouldn't want Jungwoo to end up with him either. Jaehyun was a killer, a kidnapper, the leader of a mafia, and much more, but one thing that he would never be is Jungwoo's lover.

- _22:12, Donghyuck's Room-_  

Mark felt like he was intruding but didn't want to leave his friend in tears. He slowly opened the door and set down the candles he was holding before heading to where Donghyuck was sitting. Donghyuck hung the phone up and jumped into the older's arms, squeezing him tightly and sobbing into his shoulder like there was no tomorrow.

"Do you want to talk about it?" Mark asked him, but all the other could do was cry and cry. They stayed like that for a couple of minutes before finally sitting up and sniffing. Donghyuck's nose was bright pink, cheeks flushed and eyes red at the brim from sobbing.

"Can you cuddle with me, please? I don't want to talk about it right now," Donghyuck hiccuped and sobbed some more after Mark took the other in his arms and laid him down gently.

- _09:30, ???-_

"I will take you down, Jung Yoonoh. I swear you will be dead by the end of this month!" The voice rang through the abandoned building. Multiple guards stood at by the cracking walls and listened as the voice kept shouting death threats at absolutely no one.

"Sir, we have located two of the hiding places of the SM artists." The door opened to show a shaking figure at the end of the room, holding a stack of papers and a gun sitting in the pocket. The man turned and huffed loudly, motioning the other to hand him the reports in his hand.

"These are worthless, Wonsoo! How hard is it to locate your brother?! You're as useless as your sister was, keep looking, or you'll end up just like her." Wonsoo sighed and bit his lip nervously. He never thought that he would be searching for a mafia leader, let alone be his twin brother.

"I apologize, sir. I'll keep looking for him." Wonsoo left the room and took the crumped reports with him. He set them down at an empty table and stared out the broken window. Dark clouds and heavy snow fell from the sky as his heart cracked in sadness and loneliness. Half-demolished buildings took the streets and a small number of people seen from where he was sitting. He thought about just ending it all right then and there.

He wouldn't have to keep working for his uncle or keep looking for his evil brother. He wouldn't have to keep hiding his identity and his face because that same brother was a famous idol. He wouldn't have to wake up every day, knowing that no one wanted to keep him.

- _10:23, NCT's Hiding Place-_

It was quite a late morning for the members of NCT. No one was running around, no one was yelling, some people were awake, and some were fast asleep in other's arms — late, quiet, and gloomy, which nowadays was normal.

Taeyong sat in front of the fireplace and watched the wood crack beneath the fire as he read The Godfather by Mario Puzo and others. Yuta laid his head on his lap and started to read a book his mother gave to him before he left Japan. 

"I rarely see you with books, Yuta. What's new?" Taeyong teased. Yuta huffed and smacked his shoulder with the heavy book he was holding, causing Taeyong to hiss in pain. Yuta laughed and pecked the spot he hit before going back to his original place.

"My mom gave me this book before I came here. I never had time to read it, but I do now so, I thought why not read it now? Plus, it was a novel someone recommended, and she thought I would like it, not sure why but it seems good. " Taeyong hummed in response and went back to reading his translated copy of The Godfather. Yuta tilted his head in amusement, but copied Taeyong and started reading The Diving Pool by Yoko Ogawa.

Hours passed by, and it didn't occur to anyone to make lunch or dinner. Everyone had gotten caught up in their drama that the idea of eating wasn't a thing to go to the kitchen. Taeyong placed his book down and looked at the clock,  _18:30_  beaming at him with green lettering. He gasped softly and wondered where the time had gone.

"Taeyong, I need to talk to you about something important." Johnny's voice made the other jump from his spot and almost caused a sleeping Yuta fall off the couch. Taeyong sighed and placed the asleep boy back on the sofa before creeping into the kitchen with Johnny.

"What is it? If this is about Jaehyun, I'm not going to get involved. What's going on between you two is none of my business, but if this is something else then what's up?" Johnny's lips formed a thin line, fists clenching and unclenching before finally speaking up.

"It's about Jaehyun, but it's not about us. He's been acting strange since the announcement of the idol being in a gang. Hear me out, okay? We barely know anything about his family and even Renjun is scared of him." Taeyong stood there in shock as he listened to Johnny talks about his member in such a way. 

"Johnny, what the actual fuck?!" Taeyong said, exasperated and angry at the other. "Have you ever thought about for a second that Jaehyun is just a secretive person? Or even think about sensitive things he may not even want to share with us just yet?" Johnny looked down in embarrassment as Taeyong continued with his scolding.

"We've known him for a long time. When is that time going to come? Think about it, Taeyong, just for a second, think about it. Doesn't it make you suspicious even a little bit?" Taeyong huffed and crossed his arms. He started to think about Johnny's thoughts but quickly pushed them away and went back to his scolding.

"Maybe, no, no Johnny, you shouldn't be calling your friend a gang member! I know you guys aren't on the best terms, but that doesn't mean that you can come up with random assumptions!" Johnny ran his hands through his hair and kept trying to Taeyong about Jaehyun.

"These aren't random! We need to be careful, Taeyong. No one is safe anymore, despite living in a place where even we don't know where we are, we can't trust anyone." Taeyong shook his head as Johnny tried to warn him.

"You know, what Johnny? How about you help me with dinner and we'll talk about this later. I don't think you're in your right mind and I have hungry teenagers to feed." Johnny opened his mouth, but Taeyong quickly shut it by shoving a banana into it. "If it's not about cooking or anything related to food then I don't want to hear it."

- _21:00-_

"Hey, can you hand me the remote? I want to see if there are any new movies we can watch." Doyoung said, making motions with his hands that made Ten laugh at the other. He got up from his comfy spot and handed Doyoung the remote, but not before teasing him a little. He got shoved off the couch not a second later.

Before any of them knew it, they heard distant yelling, like someone was getting scolded by another. Ten looked at Doyoung, confused and heavily concerned. He shook his head and told Ten to sit down, but he ignored him and put his ear against the door.

"What do you mean you fucking lost him? Where else could he have gone?!" Ten concluded that it was Jaehyun yelling into the phone. He didn't know they had much connection over here. And yet, here he was, shouting into a flip phone.

"What the..." Ten whispered. "It's Jae, he's yelling at someone." Doyoung raised his eyebrow and grabbed his crutches, slowly making his way to Ten and the screaming. He bit his lip nervously when the angry voice continued.

"You need to find him, now. It's not a fucking question. Find him and kill him, I don't have much access here, so you need to responsible for once." Ten gasped loudly, causing Doyoung to slap his hand over his mouth but losing balance in the process. They both crashed onto the hardwood floor and panicked as the doorknob jiggled.

"What the heck? Why can't I open the door?" Jaehyun muttered quietly. They were trying to find Lee Soo Man, but his associates were unsuccessful and immensely irritated at the amount of security. Jaehyun sighed and ran his hand through his hair.

Ten scrambled up and picked up Doyoung bridle style, rushing back to the couch and grabbing his clutches. They pretended they didn't hear a single thing, bringing their attention to the television.

"Goodnight guys, I can finally sleep after getting some cold, fresh air." Doyoung and Ten smiled nervously and waved him away. After Jaehyun left, Doyoung looked at Ten in shock. He started thinking and decided that he was probably yelling something else.

"Y-You knows, it's been a long day. We're probably hearing things, right?" Ten said shakingly. Doyoung nodded quickly and smiled brightly, looking more like a bunny every second. Ten swallowed thickly before guiding his attention back to the television.

-21:35-

"He's absolutely ridiculous, how could he lose him so fast?" Jaehyun slammed his face into his pillow and let out a frustrated scream, startling a half-asleep Jungwoo. Jungwoo stretched his arms and yawned. He looked over to Jaehyun and tilted his head in confusion.

"Jae? What happened?" Jaehyun hesitated, lips forming a thin line, but sighed and told Jungwoo what happened, but didn't tell him the exact name. Jungwoo listened intently, slightly scared, but still took in Jaehyun's struggles. He was a mafia leader, but still a person.

"Do you have to kill?" He whispered in a hurt tone. Jaehyun nodded right away and took Jungwoo's hands in his own.

"It's part of the job and necessary for our plan," Jaehyun stated. Jungwoo thought for a moment before looking up at him.

"Are you ever going to stop? Isn't it exhausting doing this every single day? You deal drugs, kill people, probably so many worse things that I don't know of, and an idol to hide it all? Have you ever thought about it?" Jungwoo squeezed the other's hands, begging for some type of answer, but Jaehyun couldn't think of one.

He wanted to tell Jungwoo that he would stop and just turn himself in, but he couldn't, no matter how much he wanted to. No matter how hard he wanted to stop the madness and his father's legacy, he couldn't.

He shouldn't.

Right?


	5. Is It Too Late?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So what am I? A monster?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi! I’m so sorry that it took months to update, lots going on and a huge writers block, but anyways! This has a lot of gore and if you want to skip the flashback you can, it’s just about Jaehyun and how his mother died.

-Flashback-

 

"Yoonoh, make sure you take out the trash, okay? We don't want any rats or ants coming in again!" Jaehyun's mother called from the kitchen. Jaehyun sighed but rushed downstairs to grab the trash bag. Although, before he could do anything else, a security guard snatched the bag from him.

 

"I apologize, but you are not allowed outside without your father's permission." Jaehyun glared at him and huffed. He just wanted to play in the snow. What was so wrong with that? Before his father got more involved with him and his mother, he would take out the trash with no problem. Often taking a while to play around before his mother called him back into the apartment from the window. But now? He couldn't even go to school without a bodyguard. Enable to not raise suspicion, the bodyguard often had forged papers to attend school with him and looked extremely young. Jaehyun tried his best to make friends that weren't working for his father or weren't out to get him, but it was no use.

 

"Mother! I'm back! They wouldn't let me go outside again." He said as he walked through the door with a pout on his face. Baby fat filling up his cheeks nicely. Jaehyun raised his eyebrow when his mother didn't respond to him, so naturally, he went into the kitchen and saw something that would change the way he saw the world forever.

 

There, laid his once beautiful mother, covered in her own blood and the knife she held to cut vegetables, was in her hand. Her throat was slit open as well as multiple stabbing all over her stomach. It looked like a suspicious suicide, but to Jaehyun, it was murder. He knew this all too well; it was their rival's signature way of killing people.

 

-???-

 

"Sir! It's an honor to meet you! I never thought I would see the day!" Exclaimed the man dressed in janitor's clothing. Wonsoo smiled and patted the man's cheek softly. He moved past him, expression dropping significantly.

 

You see, when Jaehyun and Wonsoo were born, their father was elastic! He had twin sons, both prime candidates to take over the family business, or something else, because he wanted to give them the freedom to choose. But alas, their uncle had other plans for them.

 

It was a dreadful night at the hospital, police everywhere, undercover staff trying to transfer the recovering mother and twins, and the father in some other building across the world. He was fuming when he found out he would miss the birth of his sons, anger only fueling when a bodyguard told him one of them was kidnapped.

 

He tried his best to find Wonsoo, but their uncle was too sneaky for his liking, and never found him.

 

"Let's continue with the plan my uncle set. We need to find Jaehyun soon. I want him to avenge our sister... she never had a chance to live the life she wanted." He gritted through his teeth. The older men from across him nodded and showed him places they thought Jaehyun was hiding in.

 

"Sir, most of these places are hard to find on a map, but you can still spot them. Although, there is one place we managed to uncover through a resource within the police department. It's a giant house hidden deep within the mountains, and only certain people know how to drive the rough terrain to get there. I suspect it's where Jaehyun is, but the weird thing is that through our scanners, there seems to be multiple people in that house. I think the whole idol group he's in is there as well." Wonsoo thanked him and took the documents in a plain white folder, hearing a faint gunshot when he left.

 

"We'll go there directly. I already got approval from the boss." He lied smoothly. Wonsoo wanted to see his brother badly. He knew it would cost him a lot, but this needed to be stopped.

 

-05:27, December 9th, NCT's Hiding Place-

 

"I called this meeting because the last few days, I've received many messages from our members about a certain Yoonoh. Now, I want to hear everyone clearly instead of their hushed whispers around the bathroom or kitchen. Frankly, I just want to do something in peace without thinking about how Jaehyunnie might be involved in criminal activities, so spill. Quickly before Jungwoo and him wake up." Taeyong spoke softly, Yuta sitting comfortably on his lap. Everyone looked at each other nervously before finally speaking. Ten and Doyoung going first, telling him about the conversation they heard a couple of days ago.

 

"It was weird, he said to find this person quickly and we got scared, Hyung!" Taeyong bit his lip and swallowed, motioning them to continue. "It's not only that, but we've been hearing him speak to someone over the phone a lot recently, and that's weird because I can't even call Mark to bring me toilet paper and he's in the same place!"

 

"He creeps me out, too, and I think he knows he does. I'm scared, honestly. We were close but now, it's different. He's different." Renjun muttered. Yukhei put his hand on his shoulder reassuringly. Soon, all members spoke, all except Taeyong and Johnny.

 

Taeyong sighed and rubbed his face, stressed out because what they were saying was starting to make sense. He scanned the room and stared at the second oldest, who was just looking at the door with an empty expression, hand unconsciously stroking Taeil's hair.

 

"Johnny, do you have anything to say? I know you two are very close, so I wouldn't blame you if you didn't want to." Johnny looked at him, his face not changing one bit before he spoke.

 

"I do actually, I have much to say, my dear Taeyong," Taeil looked at him worriedly, but that didn't stop Johnny from continuing. "What they're all saying is true. Jaehyun is a killer, a kidnapper, a dealer, a manipulator. He's that person that can end us in a second, but doesn't, and I don't know why." His voice was raspy, as if he's been crying for a bit too long. Taeil's eyes filled with tears, hiding his face in Johnny's chest. The other held him closer and sniffed.

 

"I can tell you why, if you're all so desperate to know. Especially you Taeyong! I'll tell you everything, since you're so worried about your Jaehyunnie being a bad, band person." A voice spoke with a mocking tone, hands gripping Taeyong's shoulders tightly.

 

"J-Jaehyun!" Taeyong squeaked. Jaehyun move one of his hands to Yuta's shoulder, giving it the same strength as Taeyong's, but this time Yuta cried out in pain. Jaehyun glared at them menacingly, showing them that the nice guy was not available at the moment.

 

"Where's Jungwoo? What did you do to him?" Yangyang shouted. When he met Jungwoo, his heart softened and even made a vow to protect him with his whole being.

 

"He's still sleeping, and if you must know, he knows, so protecting him from me isn't going to help one bit. I'm offended, though, as why you guys just didn't confront me directly. I would have told you the truth! Wait, no, I would have told you the 'truth'." He laughed, never letting go of the boys in front of him. Taeyong managed to slip from his grasp and yanked the crying Yuta towards him.

 

"Oh, did I make you cry? I'm sorry, I guess I don't know my own strength. Mmmm, no, that's not true, I actually do. What I also know, is how powerful I am, how I can destroy you with the lift of my pinky finger. But I'm not going to because I consider you all family. That car accident some of you were in was intentional, and now the people who caused it are in prison, and it's all because of me. Some people where after Taeyong a while back, and they almost got to him, but my guards stepped in and stopped them before he could even notice."

 

"I've done more for this group than you can imagine. I'm sorry I can't change the fact that I'm a monster. And I don't make Jungwoo's decisions, because in the end, he chose me. Now, are you done having this ridiculous meeting? I wanted to have a decent breakfast." Jaehyun finished with a huff. Renjun was now hiding his face in Yukhei's chest, guilt filling his heart.

 

As soon as Jaehyun turned around, Jungwoo was staring at him, his expression unreadable.

 

"And despite your actions, I'll always choose you, Yoonoh." Jungwoo whispered softly. Jaehyun opened his mouth to respond, but nothing came out. He simply smiled and stroked the other's cheek affectionately. There are times like this that makes Jaehyun want to quit. Sometime, he just wants to sit and relax with his friends and family. Sometimes he just wants to live his life as a normal person instead of fearing for his life every single second of the day.

 

-14:38-

 

"Have you located him yet?" The fact that Jaehyun hasn't been able to find his targets was starting to irritate him immensely. His contact responded with silence, causing him to throw his phone into the snow. He swallowed harshly and sat down under the tree that was next to the porch. Jaehyun hated it when he couldn't find someone. It cost him more resources and time that he didn't have at this point.

 

“Why am I even doing this anymore? Everyone hates me, I’m risking people’s lives, I’m taking lives, and for what? For my father’s legacy? Revenge?” Jaehyun muttered to himself. He looked up at the sky before getting up to retrieve his abandoned phone.

 

As he picked up the device, he heard a loud crash coming from inside the house. Immediately, Jaehyun ran as fast as h could to investigate, but not before grabbing a gun that he hid under the couch. He sprinted to the basement, but saw nothing.

 

“What the hell?” It was Johnny. The poor man was sleeping and when he heard the noises, he dragged himself to see what was going on. Like Renjun, Johnny felt guilty and wanted to give Jaehyun another chance. Although now, that was all ruined by the weapon Jaehyun held in his hand. Johnny’s eyes widened in fear and he ran to escape, but the other grabbed his hand on time, his grip tightening by the second.

 

“J-Jaehyun, I swear I won’t tell anyone, okay? J-Just don’t hurt me, please...” Johnny stuttered out. Despite their size difference, Johnny felt awfully small compared to Jaehyun. He felt as he was the spider while Jaehyun was the exterminator, trying to get rid of him.

 

“I won’t hurt you, I promise. I heard a loud sound coming from in here and I thought it was someone bad. I just wanted to protect you guys, okay? I assure you, I’d never do anything to hurt you.” Jaehyun pleads. Johnny nodded, but he was still trembling, terrified by what his best friend might do next.

 

“What’s going on? Jae-!” Taeil and Jungwoo gasped at the weapon and immediately backed away, almost slipping down the stairs. Taeil grabbed Johnny and pulled him far from Jaehyun. He opened his mouth to speak, nothing coming out. Jungwoo swallowed thickly and walked slowly to his lover, holding his hand out, shaking.

 

“It’s not what it looks like, I swear to you. I thought someone was inside, Woo, please!”

 

“Taeyong just dropped a dish! There’s no reason you should have a weapon inside the house, especially with kids here!”

 

“It’s for protection! And that was too loud to be a dish! I swear I heard something coming from down here, so please, you three leave so I can look around and make sure no one is here to kill you. Do I have to remind you who I am and the situation were in?” Jaehyun hissed out. Jungwoo pursed his lips and stayed there for a second before leading Johnny and Taeil back upstairs.

 

Jaehyun raised his gun and tiptoed around the basement, looking for someone or something that might have made that sound.

 

“So, it wasn’t just a dish; it was the whole box,p. Man, Taeyong is going to freak out over this shit.” Jaehyun mumbled. He placed the gun back in his pocket and turned around to leave, sighing disappointedly. But before Jaehyun could leave, something hit him hard on the head, causing him to blackout and bleed from his forehead.

 

“Don’t worry, brother, this will be quick.”

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me if you want to co-write!
> 
> Twitter: @universesadrien  
> Cross-posted on Wattpad
> 
> Have a nice day!


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